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Ant vs Elephant

Monkey J was telling this story to Monkey F, his younger friend:

One day, when Elephant was a little tipsy, she went to Ant and said “You’re a worthless piece of  crap. A weightless little animal with absolutely no value.”

Ant just looked down, hurt and speechless.

“There’s just no way you’re better than me,” added Elephant with a smirk.

Suddenly an idea hit Ant.

“Alright, let’s do this. I’m inviting you to a challenge.”

“You gotta be kidding me.”

At noon the next day, Ant and Elephant were looking down from an Uber helicopter. Ant had proposed that she reveal her challenge in a hired chopper. Meanwhile, all the animals had gathered below to watch the competition. Ant had secretly told them about it. Hyena in particular was preparing to laugh hard at the loser.

“So this is what we’re gonna do. I’ve made sure there are no parachutes in here.” Ant spoke confidently.

“Wait a min… no way!” exclaimed elephant upon realizing the nature of the challenge.

“The one who lands unscathed is the winner.”

Suddenly an idea hit Elephant.

“I’ll just shit on her and there won’t be a competition.”

Monkey J sat silent until Monkey F asked, “And then what happened?”

“End of story mate,” said Monkey J, passing back the blunt. “Now, who between them would you rather be?”

Monkey F took a long puff then said, “This blunt is weak.”

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